SHIRLEY KINGSLEY
Stuart
Hard-working mother raises three grandchildren while caring for mother
Shirley Kingsley talks fast, almost as if her life depends on it.
It doesn’t, but her family sure depends on her, and Shirley’s response has always been to roll up her sleeves, work extra shifts and figure out a way to get her bills paid at the end of the month.
For eight years, she’s raised three of her grandchildren for her bipolar daughter, and now she’s caring for her 82-year-old mother in her home as well. She managed it all until a few months ago, when Shirley, who turns 60 in February, finally had to have knee surgery for an injury sustained 12 years ago in her job as a waitress.
The loss of work hit her hard, and things went from bad to worse when she contracted a MRSA infection. Her leg swelled and turned “all different colors” and was pretty scary, truth be told. But finally the inflammation settled and Shirley began physical therapy — hoping to get back to work and her regular paycheck.
Shirley isn’t well enough yet for a full schedule at Sonny’s BBQ in Stuart, but she goes in most days for a few hours. The Indiana-raised woman can’t wait to pay off the debts that crept up when she was ill.
In August, she downsized to a much smaller, two-bedroom home to save on rent, turning a small family room area into a makeshift bedroom for herself. Her two granddaughters and her mom have the bedrooms, while Matthew, 13, has gone to live with his other grandmother until Shirley can make room for him again.
The children’s mother calls frequently from her home in West Palm Beach, but her inability to care for the kids prompted the state to step in eight years ago. Rather than allow the children to be placed in foster care, Shirley took in the three youngest: Katie, who was 7; Matthew, 6, and Miranda, who was 8 months old at the time.
“They were never abused,” said Shirley. “It was just neglect. My daughter took great care of them as babies and doted on them. As a teenager, she was in and out of drug rehab programs. But she wouldn’t take any drugs when she was pregnant or as a young mother.
“I’ve decided I can’t judge her like other people; she’s sick,” Shirley said of her oldest child. “I just want the best for her. This isn’t what I thought I’d be doing at 60. But you’re dealt a different card sometimes.”
With help from several local groups, the family received emergency rent money, food stamps and family counseling from Tykes & Teens of Stuart.
Fast-talking Shirley, who wastes no time feeling sorry for herself, is stressed about owing money and wants to be self-sufficient again. With a little help on her debts, some money for the kids’ Christmas presents and a good, dependable vehicle, she’ll be ready to stand on her own again.
Shirley Kingsley’s wishes
What she asked for: Money to pay off debts accumulated when Shirley was ill; a dependable vehicle; a family membership to the YMCA; a portable basketball goal for tomboy Miranda, 8; Harry Potter-themed gifts for Matthew, 13; and typical teen things like CDs, perfume and nail polish for Katie, 15.
What she received: Her bills have been paid ($9,000), which includes car payments and electric bills. The three children received $100 gift cards each for Wal-Mart.
What she said: “I cried. I couldn’t believe it when my bills were paid. I want to thank everybody that helped in my time of need. It took such a load off. And the kids will have such a nice Christmas. Someone I knew from years ago and lost touch with donated to help with Christmas gifts. It’s overwhelming. The kindness - I’ll never forget this.”
Nominated by: Jesus House of Hope, Inc.
Address: 2484 SE Bonita St. Stuart, FL 34997
Phone: 772-286-4673
Its mission: To feed the hungry and help the poor in Martin County.
